May 28, 2008

The Post That Almost Wasn't

Hello my darlings!

This is the post that almost wasn't because I actually found myself hesitating about whether or not I should come out here - to my own blog - to post something. Now you may wonder, why in the world would you have to ask yourself that, Marce?

Well... I view this blog like many other things in my life - I have a great deal of patience with everyone else, but I am a perfectionist with myself. So even though this is my own private space out here in blog land, and even though I am the master of all most of what goes on here, I really wasn't sure that I was comfortable coming out here to post until I was absolutely sure of what I would talk about. Seems strange, right? The thing is, sometimes I am actually conflicted. I ask myself, should I come out here and post some things I think you might want to read about? Or should I come out here and just write the things I want to talk about? Much of the time I am so lucky in that those two things are actually one and the same. But in the last few days, I've come to a realization. I've realized that ( in my mind) I have really strayed from my original reasons for creating this space.

My original reasons included finding a creative outlet (check!); encouraging myself to write more often (check!); and connecting with others who are doing the same (a very grateful check!). But sometimes I find myself actually NOT posting even though I want to. Not because I don't have something to say-if you know me you know I ALWAYS have something to say - but moreso because I wasn't sure if I had a "complete" post ready. And that kind of thinking bothers me a little bit. This is my personal space, and because it's personal it should reflect my personality. Part of my personality is that I don't always have everything put together before I leap. I get by on ideas, plans, conversations and many things that are unplanned and not quite fully formed, but still oh so good.

So once again, you my darling cyber friends have come to the rescue. I spent the last few weeks visiting many of your blogs. Lurking on some, commenting on others, and e-mailing with some of you that I haven't talked to enough in some time. What an enlightening and refreshing experience! I learned by stepping out of my own writing space here and by stepping into yours that this blogging thing isn't about perfection, it isn't about being always precise or prepared, and it certainly isn't about only writing what others want to read. It's about keeping the personal in a personal blog, and it's about just plain old sharing.

As with all great epiphanies, I'm sure that this will be at the forefront of my mind for a good long time (three solid days at least) and then it's urgency might start to fade. But until that time I will make a greater effort to not wait until I have all my photos lined up, or all my project notes listed out, or all my links ready and set to go. If I have something I want to share, I'm going to just come out here and share it.

Just like I did today.